EJFox.com

Taking things for granted

In which the author attempts to dissuade you from the belief things will always be the way they are now

One of the traits I get most annoyed at myself about is taking things for granted. It is a pernicious vice. It is very easy to do without thinking. It is, in some ways, built into our DNA as humans. To expect that the sun will always rise, grass will always be green, and our favorite coffeeshop will always be on the corner to make the perfect cup of coffee in the morning. Oh wait, shit. No, the coffee shop is gone. You loved it, but you still took it for granted.

The same could also be said for the friendships we make. I think a lot of my annoyance with some people and the way they approach friendship in adulthood is based in this belief. Some people expect that things will always be the same. They seemingly think that you will always have time in the future. That you will live in geographic similar places that facilitate hanging out and helping those relationships survive. I am most grateful to my friends who find time to facetime or visit despite busy schedules.

Taking things for granted comes into sharp relief when someone close to you dies. You realize the ways in which you took for granted their presence in the world.

Sometimes people are taken way too early, by chance, or by evil, and all of the plans for different futures you had made together evaporate. In my worst moments, this makes me hate myself and anyone else who takes people for granted. It makes me hate anyone who acts as if we will be here tomorrow. They don’t know that. None of us know that.

🌞